Friday, January 16, 2009

I Dream of Being The "First Dog"

For months now my family has been obsessed with politics, so now that the election is over my people’s lives can revolve around me again! I must admit that one facet of the post election world interests me and it is the talk of choosing a dog for the new first family. You can probably guess where I’m going with this, I think they should consider a Bishon Frise. We have all the qualities needed to be an excellent “first dog.” We are hypoallergenic (good for little girls with allergies) and we don’t shed. Second, we don’t mind dressing up for state occasions and we look cute all the time from all angles (especially good for those pesky paparazzi). We are spunky and friendly, but not over-bearing, (no unnecessary jumping on people) and we remember folks we like forever. . . but don’t bark or growl at people we don’t know so well.
The other night I heard the Obamas talking to Barbara Walters on TV..blah blah blah the economy….blah blah taxes…then, blah blah a DOG! My ears perked up, now we’re talkin’ about something I can sink my teeth into! Did I hear him correctly? Did he say with great disdain – “what?, a little white yippy dog, one that sits in your lap?” Don’t look at me – I’m not one of those sissy dogs. I rarely “say” anything (but I speak volumes with my eyes) and I can’t stand to sit on anyone’s lap. I’ll snuggle very close and lean but definitely not on. I’m more like “Bush 43’s” dog, Barney. Barney’s big enough not to get stepped on but not so big as to fill up a room, and from what I’ve seen, I’m sure my breed would be an improvement in the personality department.
With all this talk about “getting the girls a puppy,” I’ve got a feeling from our new President that the new dog is going to be as much a companion for him as for the girls, maybe they should get two dogs; a sweet, loving smaller dog for the girls and a bigger bolder dog for the President – they’ve got lots of room in that big house and plenty of people to take both cool “first” dogs for walks.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

I'm Mortified by the AKC Rankings

Will the indignities never end? Last month, you may recall, I told you about my “sister” Chris fitting me with false eyelashes after my demoralizing experiences with Coco Chanel, the fancy poodle. Now it’s come to my attention, that an authority no less than The American Kennel Club, has ranked the top breeds of pooches for 2007 and my breed, Bischon Frise, falls far down the list at #32. Not only am I lower than Poodles #8 and Beagles #5, but even lower than tiny little Chihuahuas #12. Even the common Cocker Spaniel and Boxers are rated more popular than my breed. Apparently the folks at the AKC haven’t met me, if they had gotten to know the “real me” I’m sure they would not have made this grievous mistake. I’m considering sending my registration papers back to the AKC as a protest against this insult.
You’re probably wondering who came in “numero uno” on the list, well it is the Labrador Retriever, oh give me a break. Sure they’re smart and friendly, but do they look good with antlers, bunny ears or false eyelashes.....I don’t think so. Though I’m disappointed to finish so far down the list, I’m a little surprised that my life-long friends Lady, April and Laddie Renshaw, the Westies, came in even lower at #35. My friend, Skamper Green, the Papillon, finished at #36, gosh, he’s the smartest “guy” I know!
If you’d like to see the entire list you can go to and check it out. My dog friends can take some comfort that we didn’t finished at the bottom of the list like the Otterhounds #156 and the very last on the list, English Foxhounds #157....I can’t imagine anything not to love about an English Foxhound, unless of course, you’re a fox.

Check out my new eyelashes

Ya know, every so often you’re going along in life feeling pretty good about yourself and “wham” along comes a day that shakes your confidence. Actually, I’ve had a couple of humbling days recently. Pat and Mike, friends of Mom and Dad, have come into my shop with their “cute little poodle”, Coco Chanel (Mom and Dad’s description, definitely not mine). Coco is small (meaning thin around the middle), very feminine and exceptionally well groomed; three attributes I’ve aspired to but haven’t acquired! I’m a Bischon Frise, I never have been, nor ever will be, trim through the middle. My family has always come to my defense when people comment that I’m overweight – do people think I can’t hear them? My people say they like me this way, it’s just my nature, Bischons are thick and sturdy. I’m not very feminine either but I am quite photogenic. And the grooming part isn’t much fun, I’d rather people didn’t fuss with me too much, all that brushing makes my eyes water. I felt a little like a “has been” each time Coco left, so Chris tried to cheer me up. She had some fuzzy stuff she’d cut from a scarf. She added double stick tape and made me a fantastic pair of false eyelashes (sexy photo, huh?). I must have really looked cute because everyone who saw me went on-and-on. They acted like they’d never seen a dog with false eyelashes! I got so much attention that I left them on all afternoon. I heard favorable comparisons to Tammy Faye Baker and Zsa Zsa Gabor – those are fancy names just like Coco Chanel. Now I have my confidence back!

Friday, December 15, 2006

My First Blog

Wow, I guess I have really arrived, now I have my own BLOG!

For year's folks have told me how much they enjoy my articles in the DIP newsletter, Chloe's Corner, the view from under the desk. Well now I have a way to reach my fans on a more regular basis.

I'll be posting here regularly to let everyone know about what's going on with our family and our friends at Digital Image Printing.

As you all probably know Mom and Dad have added on a big room at the back of our formerly small building. Now I have a much more expanded range to roam. In fact, I'm having a hard time getting used to the extra space. It's tough to find all my family and I think they have a tough time to finding each other. Eventually, they're going to have to learn how to use that intercom system they had installed. So far nobody know which extension reaches who. Pretty often I can spot Mom or Dad going around in circles through the new space and back into the old building looking for each other. I know how they feel.

There sure has been a lot of activity here lately. The folks at The Glebe are keeping us really busy with special mailings. Since we've added the extra space, we can handle more and larger jobs and doing large mailings is an area Dad seems to really enjoy. He and Rick and sometimes Mom spend many hours hanging around a little machine that puts addresses on envelopes, not exactly my idea of a good time, but seem to enjoy it.

Well, got to run, I think someone just came in with some dog treats. See you around the desk.